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Diagnosis Mayhem


Date:  March 26, 2003
Place:  Telgar Weyr's Inner Infirmary
Game:  PernMUSH
Copyright Info:  The World of Pern is copyright(c) to Anne McCaffrey 
l967. The Dragonriders of Pern(r) is a registered copyright.

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Kassi's Note:  Alas, poor Kassi; she's just never going to be able 
to completely escape the Healers, is she?  On this occasion, she not
only doesn't escape--she actively seeks one out.  It's only by the
grace of good fortune that she ends up with Sauscony rather than a
Healer who's either crazy or with an axe to grind (the latter of 
which would probably describe all the local NPC Healers, given how
Kassi keps stealing from them).  But there's something Kassi needs
to know, and it's something only a Healer can formally tell her.

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The Log:

You push the tapestry aside and walk into the inner infirmary.

Sauscony is fiddling with some healing supplies, humming softly as she does
so. Occasionally, she makes a notation on a hide. It is during one of these
pauses that she glances over to see a movement by the door. "Be right
there!" She calls over, inserting the hide into her pocket as she moves
closer.

For once, even though she's wearing her clicky-heeled boots, Kassi's
footfalls are quiet, even subdued. Rather like she's trying *not* to be
heard, when push comes to shove. And the way she nudges the entrance
curtain aside to peek warily into the room supports that notion. Be vewy,
vewy quiet. She's hunting Healers. "Oh!" she says as Sauscony speaks,
blinking once in surprise. "Craftsecond? You're here?"

Sauscony laughs softly. "Occassionally, I do manage to make my way -out- of
the hall. It allows me to keep up with the posted Journeymen." She pauses
as she considers the greenrider, a hint of a grin touching her face. "Its
has been a while, Wingleader. I trust you are well?"

"And gets you away from that most interesting room you've got, I warrant,"
Kassima murmurs, the humor that lights her eyes undoing her attempt to keep
a perfectly straight face. "Awhile and a half, I'm afraid, but since m'last
visit to the Hall landed m'youngest with a fire-lizard... well, I walk
wary. And there've been other considerations." The humor fades at that; the
wariness is back, clearly visible as she scans the premises for any sign
of--well, hard to say what she's scanning for; rose petals, maybe? "Well
enough after a fashion, but I, ah, did want t'find a Healer. Who
preferrably wouldn't be Ushu."

"I think that was Thalia's intention." Soz replies with a laugh. "Although,
I have to admit that I have gotten used to it." Her smile turns a bit wry
at the mention of Ushu. "That is understandable. I suppose, I shouldn't be
overly pleased to be preferred to him."

Kassima can only shake her head, and marvel, "What a bloody sadist she
must've been... err, nay offense. I mean bloody sadist in the awed and
somewhat admiring way, really." The wry smile gets a wry glance; she points
out, "*Anyone* would be preferrable t'Ushu, and anyone else is basically
who 'twas looking for--I didn't expect t'find you here. You'd be as perfect
as it gets, I suppose, if'n you had the time and inclination. Which you
might nay for all I know. I don't mean to assume." Why, yes, she's slightly
fidgety; why do you ask?

A hint of a smile comes to Soz's face at the fidgeting. She has seen that
before. "Something tells me that this is not a social call?" She asks,
tilting her head as she considers the greenrider carefully.

Kassima, if anything, fidgets more under the scrutiny. Which is about all
that's visually different from the norm; she might be a little paler than
usual, but given how pale she is normally it would probably be hard to
tell. "Well," she admits after a beat, "nay. I don't normally *make* social
calls down here, unless trips t'steal the jar of mint sticks counts. And
the only socializing I do then is laughing at the Healers as they yell
curses after me." She gives a quick headshake as if to dismiss the
digression. "'Twas more in the line of needing someone t'do an examination
for me."

Sauscony relents and stops staring, her casual mien turning to her
professional self. "Perhaps we should go into one of the examining areas?"
She offers as she indicates once of the curtained off cots. "And perhaps a
nice cup of tea, chamonile and mint?"

Kassima nods with visible relief, and actually steps into the room, letting
the curtain swing closed behind her. And then turning to make sure that it
is, indeed, closed. One can never be too careful. "I'd certes prefer that
t'being public about it," she agrees at her wryest--and then, with a
flicker of a genuine grin, "Put mint in aught and 'twill likely drink it,
even if'n 'tis tea. Thankee, Craftsecond." As she moves towards the
indicated cot, she asks, "You don't happen t'know how m'mint is faring, do
you, back in the greenhouse at the Hall?"

"Quite well." Soz replies as she put the kettle over a small flame. "The
apprentices have been taking quite good care of it." She adds as she
settles down. "I try not to make my teas taste to terribly bad. For the
most part." She adds after a short pause. "Somethings just need to taste bad."

Kassima settles into a seat on the cot, and immediately takes to playing
with the end of her braid. Fidget, fidget, fidget. "Good--I didn't want it
t'suffer, y'know, just because I haven't been able t'visit for awhile," and
if she's sincere about this, at least there's also a hint of wry humor to
suggests she knows how odd it sounds. "Aleinn and Jessamyne agreed t'look
after the ones I left at Greystones, and I hear she's been a demon about
keeping the kidlets away from it; I'll have t'bring her a present, next
time I visit. Mayhaps mint sticks." One of her brows quirks upwards. "This
tea," she asks, hesitantly, "it doesn't need t'taste bad, does it? Because
I don't think you'd thank me much for spewing it right back out all over
the clean linens."

Sauscony laughs softly. "This is just the first cup. I couldn't possible
serve you a terrible tea first thing." She notes, there seems to be a
protocol to this whole thing. "This is just to help you relax, chamomile
and mint only." She assures before nodding. "I think the apprentices worry
that something terrible may happen to them if your mint dies." Not that she
threatened or anything.

Kassima darts a vaguely suspicious glance towards the Healer. "So there
will be more tea, and eventually 'twill be terrible?" she tries. "Is there
any chance we could skip the terrible tea? As a personal favor, if'n naught
else? But 'twill take your word on this tea. I could," she acknowledges,
rueful, "use a relaxant." No. Really? "Huh. And I haven't even waved a
knife at any of 'em that I can recall. So they must be fearing someone
else. Can't imagine who that someone else might be, but if'n you ever
happen t'run into 'em, pass along m'thanks?"

Sauscony looks exceptionally innocent, whether it is regards to the tea or
the threatening, she remains silent as she pours out two cups of tea.
Before she settles down, she offers one to the greenrider. "I think that I
will join you, its been a long day."

"I still want an explanation of the evil tea thing," Kassi mutters, but
without much vehemence and without refusing the cup offered her. She draws
it in close, blowing very gently on the surface to cool it. "Oh, shells,
feel free. What's been long about yours?"

"The flight from the hall." Soz notes with a grin. "I know its just a
moment, but it still exhausts me everytime." Only then does she offer an
explanation. "Some people believe that tea only has medicinal value if it
tastes terrible. Why? I have no idea."

After a faintly bemused headshake, Kassima confesses, "Of all the things
it's done t'me, exhausts me has never been one--but that may be just as
well, hey? Since getting exhausted in the middle of Threadfall would be a
bit on the fatal side." Not a good time for any variety of napping, no.
Gingerly, she permits herself a sip of the tea; her pleased murmur would
suggest she doesn't find it *too* terrible. "I can be understanding that, I
suppose. I expect Healer things t'be terrible more oft than nay. But why
couldn't you serve me an evil tea until later? Oh, wait--'tis because
mayhaps 'twouldn't be convinced of the need for awful-tasting tea 'til then?"

Sauscony nods sagely. "If I served you terrible tea right off, you may
guess our secret."

"Aye, but now I know the secret anyway," Kassi points out, adopting a smug
expression. "So your evil wiles shall fool me nay more, and if'n ever you
treat me badly, 'twill spread the knowledge all across the four corners of
Pern as vengeance."

Sauscony raises a finger, a half smile coming to her lips. "One word and
the mint goes." Perhaps she is teasing, or maybe she isn't, her expression
doesn't reveal either.

Kassima's eyes widen in exaggerated horror. "'Twouldn't!" she breathes.
"Oh, Faranth. *Well*, then, 'twill just make sure a'fore I avenge m'self on
your evil people that I bring m'mints home where they can be properly
loved." She's managing a fairly deadpan *expression*, but there's a note of
humor tickling at the back of her voice.

Sauscony can't manage anymore, her laugh escaping right before she takes a
sip of tea. "I don't think I would be forgiven by the apprentices, should
anything happen to your plants." She admits, setting the cup down.

"Is that because they're so enamored of the Apprentices, or because they
think I'd rain horrific terror down on them if'n the mint should so much as
be bruised?" Kassima wants to know, abandoning all attempt to hide how
entertained she is. "If'n 'tis the former, I might worry a bit. *Multiple*
people obsessing on one mint plant can't be healthy!"

"I think it is because they like the owner, not terrified of her." Soz
points out. "They do not often cringe at taking revenge to people they
dslike."

Kassima snorts her disbelief, but nevertheless doesn't seem entirely
displeased. "They wouldn't have that much t'like me for," she points out,
"since I don't let them drag me off and poke me with needlethorns as
Healers so love t'do. Ah, nay offense intended. But if'n they're keeping
m'mint from harm, I may--may!--think more kindly of 'em, next time I do
visit. Mayhaps even bring 'em mint sticks. I'm sure our crew here could
spare a few more." As if Kassi wouldn't steal them all anyway.

Sauscony laughs. "Now that they would appreciate, both the mint sticks and
the visit." She notes with a quick smile. The healer falls silent for a
moment, considering her patient before she takes her back to the task at
hand. "You had mentioned an exam?" Get her relaxed, then jolt her with an
exam.

"Well, then, 'twill keep it in mind. But it may still be a small time."
There's a *little* fidgeting at that, but the tea seems to have done its
work insofar that the greenrider's eased out of all that twitchiness. Until
Sauscony asks her that question, anyway. At least it only inspires--for the
moment--one twitch. "Mmm. Aye," Kassima agrees, a bit reluctantly. "I hate
the bloody things, but I can't see any alternative, really."

"First, tell me why you think you need one." Soz begins, resting her hands
on her lap as she listens.

Kassima isn't seventeen shades of prompt about answering that question. She
takes a long sip of the cooled tea first, eyes down and on its contents,
and spends a heartbeat or two fiddling with the cup after it's lowered. "I
think I might be pregnant," she finally says, glancing up. "Lysseth concurs."

Sauscony nods slowly. "Aside from the sage advice of your lifemate, what
makes you believe so?" A hint of amusement touches her tone at the mention
of the dragon's diagnosis but she does seem to consider it.

"Lysseth's never said it and nay been right," Kassima feels obliged to
point out in her lifemate's defense, though she's far more wry than
offended. "Nay that she's ever *mentioned* it until I'd nigh figured it out
for m'self after the first, mind you. Because she is a *sadistic, unhelpful
wench*." She calls this towards the Outer Infirmary, where, ostensibly, her
dragon lurks; indeed, there's a distinct rumble of laughter from beyond the
curtain. "Someday I'm going t'dump her headfirst in the world's largest vat
of boiling oil," the greenrider mutters, turning back to the Healer. "But
aside from all that--the usual sorts of things. Nausea, for the past
sevenday and a half; a few sevendays late; and for Faranth's sake, I found
m'self actually *eating* fish. I don't *like* fish." There's a pause, and,
oddly enough, she colors a touch before even more oddly adding, "Nay the
*finned* kind. So."

Sauscony joins in the dragon's amusement, her laugh soft. "I was not
disagreeing, she has a way of sensing things about you that I do not." She
listens carefully for a moment, an eyebrow arching quietly at the last
comment. Her lips open, as if she were about to comment, then quickly snap
shut as if she has changed her mind. "Then all I need to do is confirm her
diagnosis?" She queries as she begins to rise.

Kassima casts a look out in the direction of that curtain. "Aye, she does,
at least if'n you listen t'her. Me, I sometimes suspect she just wants
people in awe of her mystical omniscient powers. But if'n I *say* that she
gets all grumbly and snarky in m'head, so I'll give the whole subject a
skip." There's more of that rumbled laughter from behind the curtain. Pay
no attention to the green behind the curtain! The green's rider watches all
this eyebrow-arching and mouth-opening with a decidedly sheepish
expression, seeming more relieved about the question going unvoiced than
curious for once. She nods a reluctant agreement to the final question. "It
needs t'be done, so I suppose so." She reaches to set her teacup on a
convenient surface nearby, then pauses. "Your examination methods don't
involve rose petals in any way, do they?"

Sauscony has already begin to slip out in order to give her some semblance
of privacy. At least until she hears the last. "Rose petals?" She asks,
sounding very puzzled. "Not that I am aware of." She admits after a moment.

Kassima stands from the cot to take advantage of the privacy, divesting
herself first of knives and such. "That's Ushu's thing," she admits after a
moment, sheepishness commingling with decided rue. "He uses rose petals for
*everything*. And has had, in the past, an occasional odd tendency to
decide at random that I'm pregnant and present me with plenty of the
things. I know the man's a brilliant researcher, but I honestly think
sometimes he's completely off his nut."

Sauscony snickers softly. "No roses have given their petals for this exam."
She notes.

"I suppose 'tis as well. Or some herbalist somewhere would be going after
you t'lecture on the ethical treatment of roses," Kassi murmurs,
entertained, as she slips out of the rest of her attire and settles back
onto the cot. And promptly starts staring at the wall. Poor wall. It
probably gets stared at every time she goes through one of these things.
"Just do me a favor and throw a pillow at Ushu if'n he comes in any time
a'fore you're done, hey? Or something more heavy and blunt than a pillow.
I'd nay mind that a whit."

[Editor's Note:  We decided to fast-forward through the exam 
itself, for the sake of avoiding ickiness. ;)  Sauscony's 
next pose thus takes place after everything's finished.]

Sauscony straightens, moving to the basin to wash her hands. "How many
children do you have now?" She asks, canting her head to consider the
greenrider.

Kassima doesn't quite *scramble* for her clothing when the exam's finished,
but she's certainly much, much less hesitant about pulling it back on than
she was about doffing it. "Six," she reports as she tugs her braid from her
collar. "Two of 'em twins, mind." Once she's gotten everything roughly back
in place, she sits back down and reclaims her abandoned tea. Her eyes,
fixing on the Craftsecond, are openly anxious. "The youngest's coming up on
eight."

"You may need to adjust the count." Soz notes as she picks up her now cold
tea, making a wry face as she discovers this fact. "You yourself seem to be
in good condition, so it shouldn't be a problem at all."

Kassima blows out a long breath, head dropping and shoulders slumping a
touch immediately with the loss of the anxiety that was keeping them tense.
A slow smile starts, and is in full, only-a-shade-short-of-a-grin
expression by the time she looks back up. "Good. Good. *Wonderful*. I
wanted--only I didn't know if'n I should *hope*, y'see, because what if'n
'twasn't? But I'm *glad*--" She abruptly breaks off, sheepish. "I'm
babbling. But thankee. You don't think 'twill be any problems? All's in
good order and such, then? And may I say, this tea," she adds, after
sipping at it, "tasted much better hot?"

A rather pleased expression comes to Soz's face at the greenrider's
expression. "I have a feeling that you do not need me to be telling you
what to do next, but please take care of yourself and get as much rest as
you can." She nods her agreement to the comment about the tea, offering a
warm-up from the kettle. "This may help a bit."

Said pleased expression elicits another sheepish one from Kassi, but she
hasn't lost the smile yet. "I know something of the drill, aye. Nay
*between*, nay drills, full grounding, eat good foods, drink plenty of,"
she makes a face, "milk, nay alcohol, all that sort of thing. Some of it's
a ruddy nuisance, but I can behave m'self. Mostly." Extending her cup with
a flashed grin of thanks, she further adds, "The resting part's usually the
worst challenge. Aside from the nay drinking part. But I've a bit of a
surprise in store for m'Wing that should help with that--even if'n 'twasn't
thinking I'd be spending our vacation grounded here in the Snowy Wastes
when I first had the idea."

Sauscony tilts her head, her eyebrow raising slightly. "Oh?" She prompts.

Kassima bobs her head, her grin becoming somewhat anticipatory. "Two
sevendays' vacation for the lot of 'em. And me, too, by default. They
should enjoy that; I'll certes enjoy that, and, well, now 'twill be Leya's
problem t'get 'em back in drilling spirit after the holiday, so I guess nay
being able t'leave during it isn't entirely without its compensations."

"Now that is a wonderful idea." Soz notes in agreement. "Now, you just need
someone to pamper you for the two weeks. No hidework, no drills, just
relaxing."

With a good-natured crinkling of her nose and a quiet laugh, Kassi
protests, "Do I come across as the sort of fragile flower who needs t'be
pampered? Nay that it mightn't be nice, but I can survive without. Certes
have a'fore. Ach, but with the hidework--for the two sevendays I certes
hope t'do without, but you're nay going t'tell me I shouldn't do any even
when the work starts up again, I'm hoping?"

"I think that you will be a better judge of what you can and cannot do."
Soz comments. "But I would like to you take it easy. The less stress you
have, the less stress on your baby."

Kassima nods; slowly, and not completely without reluctance, but it's still
a nod. "I'm nay much for a life of sitting about doing naught, but I won't
argue 'tisn't better nay t'take chances." She exhales a long,
thoughtful-sounding sigh, flicking hair back away from her eyes. "And I can
still swim, and ice-skate, and whatnay, can't I? For exercise and such?"

Sauscony nods her head quickly. "In fact that will be good for you and the
baby.. Just don't overdo it." She adds quickly. "When you get tired, stop."

Kassima's nod comes more easily this time. "I can agree readily enough
t'that. And, honestly, it's been long enough since Kisai that 'twill nay
pretend I'm nay sort of looking forward to another vacation--though by the
end of it I don't doubt 'twill be begging on bent knee t'be allowed back
t'work." There's an amused grin. "I always do. D'you have any other
Healer-y advice for me?"

Sauscony thinks for a moment. "None that you do not already know." Soz
admits ruefully. "I daresay that you have much more direct experience with
pregnancy that I have."

"Well, aye, if'n you've never been," Kassi concedes, grinning outright at
the Craftsecond. "It may have been a few Turns, but some things you don't
forget. Are you sure you shouldn't spawn sometime? Just t'get that
first-hand experience, as 'twere?"

"No." Soz replies, quick and decisive as the healer takes an involuntary
step backwards. "I would never do that to a child." She explains with a
shudder.

Kassima's head tilts to one side, and the look she gives Sauscony is
distinctly quizzical. "Do what to a child? You don't seem like you'd be a
particularly pernicious parent. Shutting a bairn up in some closet and only
opening the door three times a day t'feed it spinach because it has
vitamins, or some such thing."

"Patience has never been my strength." The healer admits. "I have my life
all nice and organized. I do not need a child to stir that up."

Kassima opens her mouth to form some argument, but pauses. "A child
probably would stir it up, unless you fostered it straight out," she
allows. "And even then 'twould make a muddle of your life while 'twere
carrying it, like as nay. So mayhaps you're right. Still, for what 'tis
worth, you're one of the few Healers I've known with whom the very thought
of their producing offspring didn't give me a strong impulse t'flee
screaming to the Red Star."

Sauscony is silent for a long moment, her smile widening. "I thank you for
your kind words and the sentiment behind them. But truth be told, I just
haven't found the time."

Sauscony laughs softly. "Now that would worry me if you didn't think so."
Soz notes as she finally finishes her tea. "I should probably see if my
ride is ready, I shouldn't be gone to long. Faranth knows what happens in
my absence."

Kassima's snort this time is decidedly amused. "I'd have t'be some sort of
ruddy moron, wouldn't I, t'keep having so many if'n I didn't? Shells,
seven." There's distinct wonder in her headshake. "Mum used t'prod me about
wanting at least seven grandchildren. She'll be over the bloody moon.
Oh--shells, a'course, I'm sorry for keeping you; but thankee so much,
Craftsecond. For the diagnosis, and tea, and for sparing me the evils of
Ushu, and everything. Would you give m'regards t'Craftmaster Ayanne when
you see her next?"

Sauscony snickers softly. "It is a good thing to make your mother happy."
She notes as she swings her back onto her back. "I will drop back by to see
how you are doing, but feel free to drop me a note if you feel the need."

Kassima dips her chin in agreeable fashion. "If'n any Healer has t'check up
on me, I'd as soon 'twas one that's reasonably sane," she half-agrees,
half-teases. "So I appreciate that. And 'twill do that if'n there's need
for a Healer in the meanwhile, though with nay offense in the world meant,
I'm hoping there won't be."

"You and me both." Soz replis with a grin, "So no offense taken." With
that, she slips out and presumable gets swept up by a dragon and taken
home. Or something.